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Tara Sparks, Make Him Chase You eBook .pdf

Nome del file originale: Tara Sparks, Make Him Chase You eBook.pdf
Titolo: Make Him Chase You™ PDF, eBook by Tara Sparks « ✔Truth & Facts ✔Real Results ✔Real Experiences ✔FAQ ~ ✘Reviews ✘Opinions ✘Scams

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Table of Contents



What You Will Learn


Welcome to my world... Valuable “pep Talk”


harness the power of this knowledge



Charm your way into his heart






finding love in the digital age: Online dating


Taking advantage of high-tech tools


how to super-glue him so he never leaves


choose wisely on your path to “yes”


bon voyage... reaping the rewards


Chapter One: What You Will Learn

What you will learn
am so thrilled that you are here! You are in for a special treat, as
together we are going to take all the knowledge, all the examples,
all the golden nuggets you might have missed on your journey to
discover love and apply them in all the right places. You’ve reached the time
and place where theory jumps off the page and into your hot little hands, to
mold as you must to finally realize love exactly as you want it.


Are you as excited as I am about this?
Even as excited as you are I’ll bet that you are dying to know why I call it
the Make Him Chase You System. That’s easy! It’s because this time-tested,
technique driven system you are about to learn will make him want to chase
you from the first day he meets you, and for the rest of your life together,
however long YOU decide that is!
You are about to learn never-before-revealed secrets about men, from dating,
sex, relationships, intimacy, marriage, and passion to keeping that flame alive,
and everything in between.
Now you and I can both agree that love is many things.
Love is the key nutrient you must have in your life to experience that sparkle
that flashes in your eyes.
Yes, you even need love to make your heart skip a beat.
Love is a force that leaves you searching for words to describe how amazing
you feel, yet it has been described by everyone from Shakespeare to the
prophets to cabaret singers. Every love is unique and different. Love can fuel
rapture one moment and set off a fiery rage the next. In its absence, even the
strongest will wither.
Above all, love is a
throughout your life
through dark valleys
you are off course or

journey. We can all agree that the road to love and
can be long, and anything but straight. You will trek
and ascend to luminous peaks. Often, you will feel like

This journey in and of itself is an adventure and an opportunity. The journey is
the promise of new beginnings, brighter days, lessons learned, and exuberant

Chapter One: What You Will Learn

experiences, all of which write your story.
The journey is what this program is all about.
Have you ever dreamed of living a true fairy tale romance? Finding true love?
And yes, meeting the man of your dreams?
Sometimes these dreams can seem so unreachable, wouldn’t you agree?
Do your dreams ever seem so unrealistic that they hover far out of your reach?
Believe me when I tell you there is hope, because they aren’t out of reach at
all! And I’m going to show you how you can easily attain your dreams with
less effort than you could have ever imagined before, as long as you follow the
time-tested techniques I’ve laid out here.
In fact, by the end of this program, you’ll have the EXACT skills and tools
you need to build a solid foundation, create the love you deserve, and finally
locate, keep, and feel eternal love from the Mr. Right you’ve always craved.
I must begin by congratulating you on your courage and commitment. You’ve
taken the first vital step of this extraordinary journey that will inspire you to
own your love life and guide you through a profound personal evolution.
Together, we will begin to unveil your awareness and transformation. You will
experience revelations as you navigate through intimacy and attraction. You
will attain self-truth by listening to your heart’s truest desires. You are a just
a short whisper away from becoming totally irresistible.
Now, pay attention, because the focus of this course is not on the jerks you
used to date or the knights in shining armor you want to meet now. Sure,
they’ll factor into it, and you know you’ll think of them throughout the course.
Stop and realize that they are only living within your mind because you have
yet to unlock your personal revelations. While your past is important, it doesn’t
define you, and the process of meeting and attracting great men all comes
down to the most important person you’ve ever had the honor of knowing:
For those of you who have already started to experience results because you
purchased the Attract Your Mr. Right program, this may be just a review.
Remember that it is relevant to every moment you will experience for the rest

Chapter One: What You Will Learn

of your life, so please listen up.
The promise of healthy, meaningful, loving relationships is about becoming
more confident and aware of who you are and what you want, and making
small changes in your life that result in the profound, life-shifting changes you
This journey is a beautiful learning process that has no end – it lasts for a
lifetime, as you continue to grow, evolve, and reach ever greater heights. And
I will slice it up for you ladies into delicious, cream-filled pieces.
At first, I will share with you more of Tara’s story and all the juicy details of
what you’ll learn in this program.
You will discover what finding love truly means and how to find out what you
In this lesson, you are packing up and taking a trip to go on a journey of your
self-discovery. So pack your most glamorous things, the ones that make you
feel beautiful. We will work together to find out who you really are and what
you want in a relationship.
You will learn how to become a better, stronger, more confident woman. You
will discover tools to chip away at those insecurities and other roadblocks so
you can be the woman you are, not the woman you think you should be. When
you have learned to love yourself, you will be ready to love another.
The next piece is going to cover Meeting Your Mr. Right.
This is what you’ve been waiting for, and believe me that you’ll need to go
through the rest of the program to fully comprehend exactly how to make this
work! In this section we’ll cover dating basics and beyond.
You’ll discover why the perfect man isn’t just going to fall into your lap (and
it would probably hurt if he did), as well as the exact steps to follow so that
you know how to take action and find him for yourself. Finding the perfect
man requires a proactive approach, so in the search for love, you must give
yourself options – because the more options you have, the more likely you are
to end up in a healthy relationship.
I’ll also talk about the difference between emotional and physical intimacy and

Chapter One: What You Will Learn

discuss the exact game plan you should follow to prepare yourself for meeting
men. Once you master the basics, you’ll have the opportunity to explore the
truly fun and naughty stuff like flirting.
You’ll ride along by my side as I share strategies about where to meet men,
how to approach them, and how to carry on a flirty interaction. This lesson will
go beyond turning you into a kick-ass conversationalist to becoming a master
in the fine art of flirtation.
And only then you will be ready for the next delicious piece: Finding Love in
the Digital Age.
In this section, I’ll get real about dating advice and blow away the myths your
too-long-off-the-market grandma gave you that we both know don’t work
because this is the twenty-first century. You need real proven, time-tested
techniques that will work for you. In this two-part lesson, you’ll take a look
at the biggest technological innovations that are influencing your love life,
starting with online dating.
I’ll talk about how to choose your perfect dating site, how to stay safe in and
out of cyberspace, and how to craft the perfect Mr. Right magnetizing profile.
I’ll also go over some of the most important dos and don’ts of techno-dating
and discuss a few etiquette essentials.
In the second half of the technology lesson, I’ll go beyond online dating to take
a closer look at some of the other technological innovations. I’ll outline the
basic steps of taking a relationship from the keyboard to the real world, and
I’ll discuss ways to use modern communication tools like Skype and texting to
deepen your connection with Mr. Right.
I’ll do an in-depth review of how to juggle dating and social networking sites
like Facebook and Twitter. Your love life will get a major upgrade in this section.
And lastly, you’ll never guess what I have in store for your farewell party. I’ll
briefly review some of the key topics covered so that you fully understand the
exact steps you should take right now, tomorrow, and in your future with Mr.
Plus, I’ll take a deeper look into the future of your relationships and provide
crucial information about the stages that men go through over the course of
their lives, and then blow the doors wide open so that you can take a critical

Chapter One: What You Will Learn

eye into the phases of a relationship’s progress.
I hope you’re as excited as I am to dive into this program, because there’s a
lot of amazing, practical knowledge coming your way!
First, know this: When you learn to embrace yourself and embrace change,
you will be ready to accept love. So what do you say? Let’s get started!
Your journey begins now...

Chapter Two: Welcome to My World... Valuable “Pep Talk”

Welcome to my world …
valuable “Pep Talk”


y now, you might be wondering why I have spent a good portion of
my adult life discovering the secrets that I am about to impart to you,
and the answer is simple: insanity.

Everywhere I looked, I saw my friends failing in relationships. Have you ever
heard the definition of insanity by none other than Mr. Albert Einstein? “…
Doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result.”
He knew what he was talking about.
The ability to change how you do things is the key to your perfect love life.
My friends obviously didn’t know this, and frankly neither did I until I had my
heart smashed to tiny bits. And even when I did discover that I was literally
living the definition of insanity – you know, the kind you experience when you
realize that all you have in your closet is a full week of too-old clothing and
nylons full of runs, and you know that no matter what you are headed toward
a bad hair day – I didn’t know how to stop it.
Insanity drove my life story until I discovered what I will share with you
today, and because of that my life story now comes from a desire for love and
connection that isn’t bound by continents or oceans. I began my life in Europe
and because I discovered the true love I knew I could only feel with Mr. Right,
I am still living it out it here in the United States.
The most valuable chapter in my life story thus far is the revelation of how to
create love in my life and the unfolding of my awareness of how to attract and
maintain loving and fulfilling relationships. And nothing would please me more
than to share that with you.
You must realize that I designed this program with a purpose. To give back. To
share. To foster greater love in the world.
I have learned so much about life and love that I want to spread my knowledge
I want to sprinkle it like fairy dust over single women everywhere.
Because we can agree that love can be tough.

Chapter Two: Welcome to My World... Valuable “Pep Talk”

Love can be painful, upsetting, discouraging, and depressing. All that can
make you want to give up and – dare I say the “s” word – settle!
It does not have to be this way, ladies! Regardless of your past, all the Mr.
Wrongs you’ve dated, or how many unfulfilled relationships you’ve had, you
have the power to attract magical relationships into your life. I promise you
that. The world is full of Mr. Rights, and your Mr. Right is ready and waiting for
you. I’m going to share my secrets to make that dream a reality.
So, you ask, how is this all possible?
I have made this my life’s work. It was my desire to find true love, as if my life
depended on it. So I studied it, I dissected it, I talked to hundreds of people
about it, real women, world-renowned experts and, yes, even men.
After a divorce and a string of dead-end relationships, I wanted something to
change. I was drained from living one bad relationship to the next, watching
as a piece of myself and my personal power walked away with every Mr.
Wrong. I’ve made TONS of mistakes. Big, juicy, you wouldn’t believe it unless
you heard it directly from me mistakes! And you are going to learn from all of
them so you never again make the same mistakes I did.
Please understand that this is not just about me. A cross-section of experiences
and solid research was critical to my mission. I gathered experts from all over
the world, both male and female, and engaged in summit talks on dating,
gender, attraction, and intimacy.
And you get to participate! Did you really think I’d have you just sit in a
chair and listen?! You will be guided through visualizations, exercises, and
techniques designed to help you explore your life and past relationships as
well as further the process of total life transformation.
My stories, advice from our esteemed experts, and your participation will help
propel your life to the next level, but what this course is really about is you.
That’s right – YOU!
I spent years dating men that weren’t right for me. And I thought they were
the problem. I was convinced that there just weren’t any good men left in the
world, and that if I wanted to be in a relationship, I would have to settle for
something less than what I knew I deserved. I really believed this crap.

Chapter Two: Welcome to My World... Valuable “Pep Talk”

I know now that I was settling, but not for the wrong men. I was settling for
less than what I deserved from myself – I was settling for my low self-esteem,
destructive patterns, lack of self-awareness, low standards and expectations,
and my chronic habit of dating the wrong men because I didn’t know what I
really wanted and needed in a partner. After a lot of heartache, confusion, and
soul-searching, I finally realized where I was going wrong. It wasn’t the men
who needed to change, it was me.
Let’s play with the “law of attraction” here for a bit. There are volumes about
it, but the gist is, “You attract what you put out there.” I couldn’t expect to
be the same woman and attract a different kind of man – it just didn’t make
And the same thing goes for you.
If your relationship history is a minefield of messy breakups and Mr. Wrongs,
it’s time for you to change some things. We all know that you can’t change
men, but you can change the type of man you attract into your life, and the
only way to do that is by changing yourself from the inside out.
Please be prepared to get every ounce of inspiration you paid for, and be
prepared for a challenge. I’m going to ask you to push your boundaries, think
differently, and expand your horizons. Change can be uncomfortable at first,
but as you progress it will become second nature, and even exciting!
By the time you complete this program, you’ll have a whole new outlook on
life, and you’ll understand love and relationships in a whole different way.
You’ll understand the anatomy of attraction. You’ll understand the way men
think and how to effectively communicate with the opposite sex. And when
you have those down, you’ll understand how to build the foundation for an
amazing relationship with the man of your dreams.
Your learning won’t stop there. You’ll earn a master’s in what it takes to become
your best self, and a PhD in how to expand your phenomenal success in love to
all other areas of your life. Expect great things of yourself – you are a woman
who can take charge of her life and conquer the world.
Let’s begin our journey with a little exercise. Make sure you are not driving in
this or any other exercises that will follow in this program.

Chapter Two: Welcome to My World... Valuable “Pep Talk”

Visualization Exercise
Close your eyes, breathe deeply, and visualize this experience:
You are on your third date with a man and something has clicked. You’ve
learned enough about him to know he’s a great guy, and you can feel the
butterflies in your stomach whenever you’re with him. Your hopes, goals, and
dreams seem to intertwine, and it feels like you may have finally met your
dream man.
At the end of the night, he walks you to your door. He is a gentleman and you
feel safe with him, but you also know you want something more. Now you lean
toward him. He puts his hands on your hips and kisses you softly on the lips.
You look in his eyes and he looks right back at you.
Part of you wants to run. And another part wants to jump into his arms. But
you know exactly what you’re going to do.
You slide your hands around his waist and run your nails across the small of
his back. You see him shiver and you smile. He’s under your spell. You are in
control. He kisses you harder and you fall into his arms.
Okay, open your eyes – I know you want to stay there! Now let me see a show
of hands, how many of you have lived the dream and lost it? How many of
you have never lived that dream? How many of you expect to live this dream
within weeks or months of completing this program?
Everybody should have their hand up! Two hands up! Expect it! You deserve it!
Do you want to know what happens next?
Great! Then let’s get started.
In this program you will discover golden nuggets of wisdom about YOU and,
in turn, the men around you. I want you to commit to practicing these lessons
consistently and show incredible courage. It takes some work, but you will find
this process extremely rewarding and, yes, even FUN!
My goal is not to give you a to-do list. It is to help you develop the mindset

Chapter Two: Welcome to My World... Valuable “Pep Talk”

and skills to captivate a man and help you understand what you want out of
love. I want to guide you to finding The One and making him feel like life is
not complete without you.
Right about now, you’re probably thinking, “What are these magic tools Tara
is talking about?” Maybe you’re wondering who I am and what makes me
such an expert. Much like you, I am a woman committed to learning from my
mistakes and turning them into gold. I found that everywhere I turned, bright,
attractive, worthy women were frustrated with love and dating. Being the
eternal optimist, I knew there was a solution to the problem. But I’m getting
ahead of myself.
Let me tell you a little about my journey. You may just recognize yourself in
some of my experiences.
I was born in Europe and succeeded both in the corporate world and as an
entrepreneur. I founded a company dedicated to helping people lead happy,
healthy lives, and discovered my passion for helping others become their best
Like every little girl and woman, I fantasized about falling in love with my
Prince Charming. I had read all the storybooks: One day, a knight in shining
armor was going to sweep me off my feet and together we were going to live
happily ever after, right?
Wrong. As I grew older, I realized that it’s much easier to find the frogs than
the princes, and for the longest time I felt lost, lonely, and depressed. I was
convinced that I was never going to find the perfect man for me, so I told
myself that I just wasn’t meant to fall in love.
I was so afraid of being lonely that I thought it would be better to settle for
something less than what I deserved than to be alone. I felt like settling was my
only option. At such a young age, I’d thought that a man was “good enough”
if he didn’t drink, didn’t smoke, and made me feel secure. I didn’t know that
there is SO MUCH MORE to a happy partnership, and that I deserved to have
everything I wanted in a man.
Then, as my professional life started to take off, a man came into my life and I
thought I’d finally found LOVE. You know, someone I could spend my life with.
I wasn’t going to be alone after all!

Chapter Two: Welcome to My World... Valuable “Pep Talk”

Our son was born four years later, and I felt like the pieces of my life had all
fallen into place.
I was wrong again. Shortly afterward, my life came crashing down around me.
I thought I’d married my Prince Charming, my one true love, my destiny. I
thought we were going to be together forever. But after ten years of marriage
I finally realized – I was unhappy. The man I’d married wasn’t my soul mate.
There was no passion or intimacy in our marriage. I didn’t even fully trust him
with my innermost desires.
Our marriage was an institution, not a relationship. He didn’t support me
professionally. He heard me but he didn’t listen to me. He didn’t KNOW me nor
did he care to. I tried to discuss my concerns about our relationship with him,
but he dismissed them. It was just another thing he didn’t want to talk about.
I clung to my hopes that I could salvage our marriage, but as time went on I
felt increasingly suppressed and controlled. I eventually stopped expressing
my needs, dreams and desires, which led to feelings of frustration and anger.
I surrendered my individuality and became an extension of my husband because
I thought it was the only way to save our relationship. I lost my identity and
allowed my life to become so tangled up in his that I no longer knew what I
wanted or who I was. I didn’t even know if I honestly liked the color green or
did so just because he liked it! I had no confidence left, no sense of my own
identity, and no idea what love actually was. But the one thing I did know was
that it was not this!
I came to the sad conclusion that my husband never had been my ideal partner.
I chose marrying a man who wasn’t right for me over being single. I left my
marriage with tears, fears, and doubts.
This is where my story really begins.
This is where ME begins.
I rededicated myself to finding my true love. My soul mate. The man who
would truly and honestly love every cell of my being. The one who lives to
bring me pleasure. The one who can’t wait to grow old with me. The one who
wants me to want to get up every morning and give the world the best I’ve
So I charted my course. And it began with a major attitude makeover. I realized

Chapter Two: Welcome to My World... Valuable “Pep Talk”

I could no longer blame my husband for my unhappiness. To change my life,
I had to change my thinking, beginning with three truths:
· Only I was to blame for the choices I made. My husband was an innocent
bystander in my journey of marital unhappiness.
· Being in no relationship is better than being in the wrong relationship.
· My past mistakes will never prevent me from moving forward and
searching for something better because I am not my past, just as you
are not your past.
After the revelation of these very powerful truths, I was driven to thank
the universe for everything my marriage taught me about love, intimacy,
and connection, even though it wasn’t the right relationship for me. I took
responsibility for my actions, I took responsibility for my mistakes and my
choices, and, above all, I took responsibility for my happiness.
I realized I knew nothing about men. I knew nothing about myself. I knew
nothing about my needs and desires or what it takes to create love. I had
been walking blindly through life. But I was going to change all that. Or so I
I then began my new life as a single woman with a young son.
Along with my newfound freedom came the instant “crazy.” I wish I could say
that my life changed overnight and that I lived happily ever after, but that’s
not even close to what actually happened. Instead of feeling empowered by
my commitment to creating a better life for myself, I felt more helpless than
I was desperate and scared. I often regretted my decisions. All my old feelings
of loneliness and depression came flooding back. I didn’t want to be alone for
the rest of my life. I didn’t want to be a divorcée, a single parent, a pathetic,
lonely mess. I was completely lost again, and what was left of my confidence
quickly shriveled up and disappeared.
Once again, I let my fear of being alone dictate the choices I made. I was
terrified that no one would want to date a single mother. I didn’t understand
how I was supposed to learn to take care of myself when I had to take care
of my son.

Chapter Two: Welcome to My World... Valuable “Pep Talk”

I was convinced that no man would want to be with a woman who came with
so much baggage.
I felt unattractive, vulnerable, and, worst of all, unlovable. Have you ever felt
that way? I know that so many of us have.
I tried to enforce a strict no-dating policy after my divorce, so I could take
time to relearn who I was outside of my marriage, discover my needs, and
rebuild my confidence. And like so many of you, my fears and insecurities
made me needy, and even though I was far from ready, I began to date again.
The insanely wild and lusty ride that followed was the inspiration for the secrets
you’ll learn today. I realized that my low self-esteem and insecurities did not
serve my greatest good, because I was down on myself even when I had no
dates at all, and when I did have dates, they were with guys that just weren’t
right for me.
I dated every type of guy, from chronic overachievers to struggling, sensitive
men who relied on me to buy their groceries and everything in between!
I dated a man who was more than twenty years my senior and another who
was a decade younger than me. They were tall and skinny, short and thick,
fitness freaks and computer geeks. Though they were all different, they had
one thing in common: None of them was right for me, and I still wasn’t happy.
Then, for the second time in my life, I thought I’d found The One! I thought I
was in love with the perfect man. He was kind, generous, and successful, and
we were crazy about each other. He even bought me a ring and set a date for
our wedding.
There was just one problem: He was already married.
Auggghhh! For the second time, I had allowed my fear of being alone and my
low self-esteem to take control of my life. I let myself live in a fantasy world
with a married man for almost a year, until he broke his promise, for the third
time, to end things with his wife.
When we split up, I plummeted into an emotional black hole. I felt angry,
guilty and sad. I was in earth-shattering pain. I didn’t understand how I could
possibly have lost myself again, gotten involved with a married man, and made

Chapter Two: Welcome to My World... Valuable “Pep Talk”

the mistakes of my marriage over and over again – even after I promised
myself I’d never do it again.
Have you ever heard of the book Smart Women, Foolish Choices? That was
me! I am an intelligent, mature woman, I told myself. I had been married
once. I was supposed to know better. How could I have let things get so out
of control?
I tried to rationalize it, because the realization that I had once again stopped
being my authentic self just hurt too deeply. I had committed a terrible crime
against myself when I lost sight of what I really wanted and who I really was,
and because of that I had gotten involved with the wrong man yet again.
I decided right then and there to stop acting out of desperation. I thought I
was being more selective, but I was still dating Mr. Wrong after Mr. Wrong.
Something had to change, and that something was ME.
I then made the decision to transform my life. Things were going to be different
this time. I wasn’t going to walk through life with my eyes closed anymore
because let’s face it, when you walk around with your eyes closed, all you gain
are bumps and bruises.
At that exact moment, I decided that I wouldn’t allow romance to pass me by
because of my former belief: the belief that I was a princess locked in a tower
and that love was supposed to come to me. I found that I had the key all along
and had never really been trapped.
That was IT! My epiphany! My whole life I’d had it wrong – I wasn’t supposed
to wait around for love to find me, I was supposed to make love happen, or
better yet, I was supposed to attract Mr. Right. It was like a light bulb was
suddenly glaring above my head. It may as well have been a neon sign!
I realized that there’s no such thing as my “other half” – nothing was missing.
I was already whole. I wasn’t afraid to be on my own and I knew that I had
to set boundaries and raise my standards. I dedicated myself to becoming a
confident single woman who knows what she wants and isn’t afraid to claim it.
A woman who is not afraid of HERSELF – the woman you’ll become if you just
allow yourself to take the simple, proven steps to make it happen.
I knew that process had to begin from within, so I made a commitment to

Chapter Two: Welcome to My World... Valuable “Pep Talk”

transform into the best version of myself that I could possibly be. Only then
would I share my life with a man, because it became clear to me, just like it
has to you, that just any old man wasn’t something I wanted, or needed. I
wanted Mr. Right, but I sure didn’t need him!
And that’s when my life changed. Not instantly, but it did happen far more
quickly for me than it might for any woman who doesn’t follow the rules. Step
by easy step, I followed the path of my personal journey just like the one you
are about to embark on. I looked deep within myself, and over time things
began to change for the better. And now my life is fantastic and my story is
legendary! I feel confident and in control of my destiny. I don’t let men define
my life. I know what I want and I take action to get it. And yes, I’ve found
a great relationship with a wonderful man. You will be there soon, too, and I
can’t wait!
Along my journey, I learned so much more than I ever thought was possible. I
began to practice what I had learned, and it worked! By raising my standards
for myself, I noticed a dramatic shift in the caliber of men I was attracting.
I stopped my nail-biting pattern of drifting from one bad relationship to the
next and created fulfilling relationships with caring, quality men.
I realized I had choices, just like you do, and knew that I would never have to
worry about settling again.
My hard work and dedication changed everything for me and led me to find
a beautiful relationship. I am sharing with you because I believe that every
woman on the planet deserves the same.
Right now, it’s time to examine some of the beliefs that may be holding you
back, which could be some of the same beliefs that held me back for so many
Pause for a moment and really consider these questions. Stop and feel how
they resonate deep within your soul and then answer these only to yourself.
Do you doubt you’ll ever find love?
Have you lost all hope?

Chapter Two: Welcome to My World... Valuable “Pep Talk”

Do you feel as though you are destined to be alone forever?
If you answered yes to any of these questions, then chances are you’ve been
disappointed in the past, deeply hurt, or even just don’t believe you are worthy
of love. You see, you are using these beliefs as a safety net to avoid the pain
from your past. And because you believe these things, they continue to be
true, so it’s time to shake up your beliefs about yourself. It’s time to change
your past.
Are you ready to begin seeing a dramatic improvement in how you feel about
dating right now?

Visualization Exercise
Make sure that you are in a safe and quiet place where you can close your
eyes and focus.
Relax and take five deep breaths.
You might discover that it is easy to remember the most amazing moment
in your life; I want you to take a moment and just drink in that time, the full
Consider how bright it was that day, how you felt in your heart, what you were
wearing, how the people who mattered most to you were dressed, and how
the beautiful aromas in the air smelled.
Where were you? What sounds stand out to you the most? Can you hear the
sweet voices of those you love, the sound of music playing in the background,
the natural sounds that you hear when you play outdoors, or the quiet hum of
machines inside?
Pause this recording and write down every detail you can remember. What you
saw, heard, felt, how things around you felt to the touch, the feeling of your
clothing against your skin, the sweet sounds around you, if you were eating,
what the delicious food tasted like, and even anything aromatic you smelled.

Chapter Two: Welcome to My World... Valuable “Pep Talk”

Write down every detail, how bright it seemed in your reality at that time, how
amazing you felt, who said what, every little thing.
Once you have fully described the entire moment to the best of your ability,
return and push play so that we can continue. It is vital that you write down
this memory with as much detail as possible because we will be using this
frequently throughout this course, so make it the best memory you can find
inside of your incredible mind.
All done? That felt amazing, didn’t it?

Exercice Continues..
Now we are going to put this incredible memory to good use. I want you to
close your eyes again and bring up two screens. One with that phenomenal
memory, remembering every detail as you described it. Would anything have
made this moment better? Add it in! You can most certainly change your
memories, and you are about to see how to feel really good about bad things
that happened in your past.
Now, pause that wonderful screen, and on the second screen, remember the
last painful event you experienced as a result of dating. Only play this memory
through one time before pausing it.
You might find it easier as you are viewing these two screens in your mind to
pause your favorite memory as you remember one that is not so wonderful;
remember the last painful thing you experienced as a result of dating. Only
play this memory through one time and then pause it.
Right now in your mind, right in front of you, you will see a knob. This knob is
a magical knob that allows you to turn things up and down.
Did you notice how your two memories are different in brightness? You’ll find
it very easy to turn the knob so that your bad memory is as bright as your
amazing memory. Now focus on the volume level, if something negative was
said in your not-so-good memory, turn the volume down; turn the happy
sounds up, such as the sound of your breathing, your heartbeat, anything
positive you notice in the background until you realize that you naturally begin
to feel happier. Now imagine that you are wearing the same clothing in your

Chapter Two: Welcome to My World... Valuable “Pep Talk”

bad memory as you did in your happy memory. Imagine feeling the same,
doing the same thing; begin to shift your bad memory to feel more like your
favorite one.
By now you should be feeling pretty amazing; just keep turning the volume
up on any positive thing you notice in your negative memory. Make sure that
your negative memory reflects the same sounds, colors, brightness, feelings,
clothing, tastes, and everything else you see in your dream. I will wait for you
before I continue.
That bad memory doesn’t feel as bad now, does it? Feel free to open your
eyes. What you have just done is change the feeling around your negative
Some of you may have experienced a memory that felt really icky, and you
know who you are! I want to invite you to close your eyes and try to bring up
that memory again.
I know that you’ll feel better soon, if you don’t already, when we complete this
I want you to view that memory we just changed, which is not quite as painful
now as you view it on your screen.
Now you have an option, a wonderful option. And you can choose to take this
option now, or take it later.
Do you want to get rid of any remaining, icky feelings you are feeling right
now because of this memory?
If not, please feel free to keep this now happy memory, but if you are feeling
any anxiety at all I encourage you to take this next step.
I want you to take this memory and push it out in front of you until you can
see it as though you are sitting in a movie theater. You might like to push it
way out in front of you as though you are moving away from it until it is so
tiny that you could hold it in your hand.
You might consider pushing this memory into space now, at rocket speed.
All you need to do is grab hold of that palm-sized memory and load it into the

Chapter Two: Welcome to My World... Valuable “Pep Talk”

slingshot that has appeared magically in front of you.
Pull back as far as you can and LAUNCH!! And watch as you begin to experience
instant relief as that memory turns into a fiery ball and disintegrates in space.
You might be ready to open your eyes now.
How do you feel?
Wouldn’t you enjoy feeling the near-climax of amazing right now?

Exercise Continues..
You might like to close your eyes one more time and recall that amazing
memory, the one that you hold so dear to your heart. In fact, it makes your
heart sing.
See it on the big screen in front of you, now walk up and step into it, step into
her, the woman you were the day you felt amazing.
Feel how she felt, how her clothing felt against her skin, the sweet smells, the
inspiring sights, the delicious taste on her palette, the sounds that she heard.
She is you, and you are her, and you are in full control.
Wouldn’t you like her to feel more amazing? You can feel the knob in your
hands, the knob that only you control – turn her happiness up, magnify her
joy so much that you feel elated right now. Turn up the volume on the happy
sounds, and turn up the light until everything in your view seems shimmery
and brilliant.
You might enjoy turning up the sweet smells and delicious tastes. Turn up
everything amazing, positive, and powerful until you have maximized every
happy vibe in your entire memory, and when you reach that point I want you
to keep your eyes closed while touching your thumb to your pointer finger and
say the word, “Dating.” I will wait for you before I continue.
Close your eyes and pull up that memory again, remember to turn up everything
in your memory until it all feels amazing, brilliant, and magical, and then I

Chapter Two: Welcome to My World... Valuable “Pep Talk”

want you to repeat touching your thumb to your pointer finger and saying the
word, “Dating.” I will wait for you before I continue.
When you are done, do it one more time, feel how amazing, relaxed, and
inspired you felt at that exact moment, and when you believe you have reached
the pinnacle of your joy touch your thumb to your pointer finger and say the
word, “Dating.” I will wait for you before I continue.
Now, open your eyes.
Now you fully realize that you have the power to improve both your love life
and your entire life. You can change how you feel about your past, because
your past doesn’t own you. You must become aware of your thoughts, your
feelings, your limiting beliefs from your past and use the tools I’ve provided
today to create a climax, a feeling of amazing, any time you find yourself
wanting to feel empowered, joyful, and full of love.
Every woman has the power to improve her love life and find a fulfilling
relationship with a truly wonderful man. With the man who was placed here on
this earth just for HER. You have the power to be with the man who is waiting
for you right now, because believe me when I tell you he is out there, and he
misses you before he’s even met you, just like you miss him. You just haven’t
found each other yet.
Success – in love and in any other area of life – starts from within. Before you
are ready to love someone else, you have to fall head over heels in love with
yourself. It all begins with you.
By now you’ve caught on that it’s not about the guy, or about getting the guy,
it’s all about you, it’s all about the fact that you have the goddess within, you
have everything you need to be incredibly attractive to scads of men.
You simply must be willing to introduce that goddess to the world.
Mr. Right is something that you want; it’s not something you necessarily need.
And it is that mindset that is going to attract the right kind of guy to you. The
guy is like whipped cream on top of the most delicious cup of hot chocolate.
You are the hot chocolate.
You have everything you need to be irresistibly attractive to men. Together,

Chapter Two: Welcome to My World... Valuable “Pep Talk”

we’re going to unlock that power. You already have it!
Doesn’t that sound delicious?
Get ready to jump into the next piece to discover some of the juiciest instantchange techniques you’ve ever experienced. See you on the dating side!

Chapter Three: Harness the Power of this Knowledge

Harness the power of this
elcome back! I am so excited to see you take the first steps toward
unearthing one of the many talents you were born with as a woman
– finding and keeping that special man. That talent can get a little
rusty sometimes.


We all agree that the pressures and letdowns of the dating world can have
that effect on a woman. The important thing is that you are in the right place
right now, and whether you just want to dip that big toe in the dating lake or
jump off a cliff into a sea of hungry fish, I’m right here with you, supporting
you every step of the way.
I have learned so much about love. Do I know it all? Hell, no. Have I thrown
myself in without a parachute? You betcha.
The result: loads of knowledge and loads of tools that I can’t wait to share
with you.
And listen up because this segment is golden, ladies. So golden that I would
venture to say it is the most important topic of all. Why? Because it focuses on
YOU. Without addressing exactly what it is you want, you’ll just be swimming
around without a purpose, and wasting a lot of time.
I know there are tons of women who are now enduring that same struggle.
But it doesn’t have to be painful; as a matter of fact, it is that very pain that
stands in your way more than anything.
This is supposed to be a pleasurable process, not a painful one! I want to inspire
you to make a series of small yet significant moves that will revolutionize your
love life. And I’m going to make it easy.
The information is all yours for the taking, like a big bountiful buffet of wisdom
from a bevy of experts in the field, and of course, moi (“me” in French). So
allow me to make you a plate. In each section, I will serve you an appetizer
consisting of the top three lessons. Consume those. Digest those very important
points. Then go deeper. Go at your own pace, but go in this order. The complex
details will come with subsequent listens. There’s a lot to learn, but together
we’ll have fun doing it.

Chapter Three: Harness the Power of this Knowledge

In this section, the Top Three Takeaways are:

The process of meeting your dream man is not about a simple checklist
or creating the perfect post on It really isn’t about the
man at all. It’s about YOU. Self-awareness is the key to just about
any door in life, especially the door to successful dating.


Set the bar way high. Know exactly what you want and what you
need from a relationship. And more importantly, what you DON’T
want. In some ways, it’s easier to start with the “don’ts” because,
unfortunately, we have experienced more of what we don’t want and
are acutely aware of those things.


Have the confidence to ask for the things you want and reject the
things you don’t, and stick to it!

This series will provide everything you need to prepare for the parade of men
that will be marching in your direction. Before we get into the practical nuts
and bolts, we need to create a solid foundation for your personal growth and
confidence: your newly discovered love for yourself.
When that foundation is in place, you can have whatever you want.
So watch out, and as your mother used to say, “Be careful what you wish for!”
Let’s begin, shall we?
Get your beautiful self in front of a mirror. Gaze into your eyes. Now say (yes,
out loud, ladies) three things that you admire about yourself. They can be
anything at all that makes you feel proud, unique, and confident, and anything
that makes you feel absolutely amazing about being you.
For example, you could say, “I’m so proud that I am loved and admired by my
brother’s children. They tell me I am the best aunt in the world. It demonstrates
that I really do have the capacity to love and care for others.”
Or you could say, “I am proud that I have become an independent, selfsufficient woman. I earn a good living and have saved up some money. I have
my own home and a car that I love.”

Chapter Three: Harness the Power of this Knowledge

Perhaps your admiration is physical. You could say, “I have the most beautiful,
shapely, sultry hips.”
The only guideline here is that you must genuinely believe the things you say.
It’s wonderful if others see the positive qualities in you, but that’s not enough.
You must see them in yourself.
So what are some of your strengths?
Is your skin as supple as a Disney princess’s? Do you engage people at parties
with a wit like Joan Rivers? Could you be the poster girl for a teeth whitener
with your bright smile? Are you a great listener? Do you have boobs that still
stand up when you bend over to pick something up?
Now why did I ask you to do that? What does talking about the things you’re
proud of have to do with finding love?
The process of finding love is more about finding yourself than anything. It is
about being open with yourself 100 percent; it is about full self-awareness.
Gaining self-awareness is key. Self-awareness involves having an inner life.
You could be open, closed, fearful, uncomfortable, or even judgmental. Selfawareness is knowing what turns you on, what turns you off, what you like,
what you don’t like, what makes you angry, what opens you up, what’s most
important to you, and what are you really about.
It’s having an inner person – another person within yourself – and having a
relationship with that woman. And you are never alone because she is always
there, even when Mr. Right is not.

Self-awareness starts from within and is created from a few dashes of
confidence and a full cup of honesty. Before you’re ready for a relationship
with a man, you need to know yourself fully and love yourself deeply. You need
to be honest with yourself about what you want and what you don’t want. And
you need to have the confidence to go after those things. When you raise your
standards for yourself, you will see dramatic changes in the quality of men you
Being self-aware means knowing your own habits, patterns, thoughts, needs,

Chapter Three: Harness the Power of this Knowledge

desires, traits, emotions, and behaviors. It means facing the ones you don’t
like so much and honoring the ones you are proud of.
It is also a measure of your ability to identify which of those are positive forces
in your life and which are negative forces.
A self-aware woman is strong within. She knows who she is and what she
wants. She knows what she needs to improve and what makes her exceptional.
She has created and nurtured a strong and honest relationship with herself. As
a wise person once said, “Go within, or go without.”
Self-awareness is the foundation of all successful relationships, and here’s
why: If you’re disconnected from your own feelings and experiences, you’ll
end up in the wrong relationship over and over again.
You’ll date men who don’t meet your needs because you won’t understand
what your needs really are.
You will also have trouble building intimacy, because without a deep
understanding of who you are, you can’t share yourself with another person.
Simply put: You can’t find the right relationship unless you know what makes
a relationship “right” for you in the first place.
When you know who you are at the deepest, core level, you can develop a
vision of what you want for your future and create a plan to make that dream
a reality. Put an end to everything in your life that doesn’t feel 100 percent
right to you. These short-term losses will evolve into long-term gains.
When you know what you want, only then can you have what you want.
When you truly know what your needs are, it’s time to start falling in love with
who you are. LOVING YOURSELF has three ingredients: wanting, deserving,
and receiving.
You may want something, but if you don’t believe that you deserve it in the
first place, how will you be able to receive it when it comes along? You won’t.
The idea of being deserving is difficult for many women, but it is as simple as
a shift in thought. It’s just a whisper away.
Men love women who love themselves. You can’t receive love from a man if

Chapter Three: Harness the Power of this Knowledge

you’re unable to accept love from yourself first.
Speaking of receiving love and admiration from a man, I suspect there are
many among you who have shut down when opportunity came knocking.
Did you smile when that great-looking guy held the door open for you?
Or did you mutter a barely audible “thanks” and walk away thinking, “Why did
he do that?”
When your colleague told you how great you looked at the office holiday party,
did you proudly thank him and smile, or did you say, “Ugh, I gained like 10
pounds over the holidays, but thanks anyway”?
Men feel good when you can accept a compliment with grace, yet uncomfortable
when you try to prove him wrong. And this is not the area to try to prove him
wrong in! Pick your battles, ladies, but the last thing they should be about is
a compliment.
It’s like slapping yourself in the face when you don’t believe a man could be
You’re telling yourself that you’re not worthy of love, and that belief will
subconsciously cause you to run from anything that has the potential to
become a good relationship. And it won’t do much to help keep him around,
Does that sound like the recipe for a happy love life? Of course not. So what
is a girl to do?
The answer is “confidence.” One of the most interesting things I learned over
a lifetime of relationships, both good and bad, is that the men you attract are
a reflection of who you are on the inside.
When you lack confidence, that little mousy girl inside of you takes over and
makes you think you are just not meant to find love.
And worse than that, when you don’t value yourself, you will attract men
who won’t value you. You won’t be treated as well as you deserve and your
confidence will plummet even further. It’s not a pretty cycle and I know you’d
love to change it, wouldn’t you agree?

Chapter Three: Harness the Power of this Knowledge

So let’s shift gears. Have you ever asked yourself, “Who would ever want to
date me?” It’s time to end that thinking. The right question is, “Who is going to
be lucky enough to date me?” Attitude is everything. Men feel it. Your attitude
not only attracts them to you like a magnet, but it improves the way they treat
So why do we keep attracting jerks and assholes? Jerks and assholes, on
some level, will make you feel safe. If you are feeling unworthy and insecure
about yourself and that you don’t deserve to be loved, to have someone, or to
be around a guy who really cares about you, then you won’t have a man who’s
trustworthy, respectful, and accepting and who can communicate with you.
It’s too risky because if you were with someone who wasn’t an asshole, you
would have your unworthiness exposed. That’s scary. So the assholes that you
are attracting, on some level, may feel safe and normal.
Therefore, the focus should not be on the wrong guy you keep attracting – it
should be on you.
I have a girlfriend who was a marathon dater, but every one of her relationships
fell apart and she couldn’t understand why. Then, breakup after breakup, the
light bulb went on: They were great men, but they weren’t great men for her.
She was never upfront about what she wanted and needed from a relationship,
so they were never able to give it to her.
Instead of just being herself, she tried to be what she thought was the “perfect
girlfriend.” And that wasn’t what her boyfriends wanted. They wanted HER.
Ladies, the secret is that the most attractive person you could ever be is NOT
the woman you think you should be, but rather the woman you are. So dig in
and find out who she is. You might like her.
Sometimes it’s hard to figure out what you want, so I’m going to give you just
a little nudge about common relationship needs. If you find these things with
a man, they’re good signs that a relationship with him has the potential to go
the distance.
They might not all resonate with you, but they’ll give you a foundation to
work from as you develop self-awareness and define your own list of needs,
wants, and deal-breakers. Most of you came here to gain even more insight
and knowledge and become more advanced as experts on you and the dating

Chapter Three: Harness the Power of this Knowledge

arena. For those of you who didn’t and who want to delve deeper into what
you need to want and what you might want to cross off of your list, check out
my Make him Chase You Playbook.
Now, we’ve all heard the phrase that love is unconditional, right?
That is not always true. In fact, every relationship has a few conditions,
conditions that I will briefly cover and that you must know before you move
forward into your relationship with Mr. Right.
Let’s start with the most basic of all: love.
What a surprise, huh? Hold the phone because we may need to do some
wiggling before you all fully understand what KIND of love I am referring to.
The love you must have in every relationship is love for yourself. Now, this
isn’t the kind of love that you can get from the attractive man you see in the
elevator every morning on the way to your office; this is real, deep, doesn’t
matter what you look like, smell like, act like, or feel like self-love. Self-love
allows you to avoid the “Once I” disease at all costs.
You may never have heard the name, but you know the Once I disease. Once
I make money, once I lose ten pounds, once I paint my apartment. If you’re
waiting to reach a goal before you can achieve love or because you think you
are “less than” in a certain aspect of yourself, you are suffering from the Once
I disease. You think that once certain things are fixed, all will be well.
Wrong. There will always be something to improve, but nothing will improve
until you love yourself where you are right now. Only then can you draw in
more success, more self-love, and more self-awareness. And the man who’s
going to come into your life is going to love you for who you are now based on
the attitude you have about where you are now.
You will never have what you want in a relationship unless and until you are
able to accept and love yourself fully.
When is the “right time”?
It’s right now.
You can drive yourself insane with the “once I’s.” But truly, they are nothing

Chapter Three: Harness the Power of this Knowledge

but fear. Pure fear. Of failing. Of not finding someone. Of rejection. They are
true cop-outs to put off whatever it is that you fear. So step right over that
fear as nimbly as you would over hot coals and get yourself on the other side.
Communication is the next biggie. Now, I know that many of you have already
experienced an incredible shift in the way that you understand communication,
and know how to communicate with Mr. Right since you’ve read Attract Your
Mr. Right. I will quickly touch on this for those who haven’t.
Communication fosters connection, and we want to feel connected to our
partners. We want to share our feelings and feel supported and cherished.
Have you ever spent hours primping and pruning for a date, right down to a
full leg shave, just to knock his socks off when he arrives? But you get nothing
from him, nada, zilch; all that work for nothing!
It’s like he didn’t even notice!
We love men who tell us that we look beautiful, that they love us, that we
bring light into their lives. All the time naturally but, sheesh, especially when
we do all that work for it.
If that kind of open, loving communication is important to you, as it is for so
many other women, then don’t settle for a man who doesn’t give it to you.
Stop right now and do a double check before we move on.
Have you started to create your Needs List yet?
Write the following on your Needs List and underline it several times so that
you are guaranteed to stick to it. “I only date men who are willing to tell me
how much they appreciate me.”
Clear and to the point – stick to it, don’t veer from it. Even if his eyes are
cobalt blue and pierce your soul, and he smells really good.
Now I’ve learned my lesson: If you need something, ask for it. There is no
reason to cling to something that is not fulfilling your wants and needs.
What else is on your checklist of wants and needs?

Chapter Three: Harness the Power of this Knowledge

Support and attention make my ears perk up. Have you ever had a conversation
with him and just wanted to storm off and call your BFF in the midst of it
because he wasn’t even looking at you, let alone appearing interested?
Giving is another big need for me. So how did you feel that time he showed
up with flowers and it wasn’t Valentine’s Day? Pretty amazing. How about the
time you were at your favorite boutique and as you stepped out of the fitting
room with that cute dress on, he said, “Wrap it up”? Yeah, you know where
I’m going with this. Presents should not just be reserved for birthdays and
holidays. Most women adore receiving tokens of a man’s affection, and lots
of guys like receiving gifts, too. No matter how big or small, the message is
always, “I’m thinking about you.”
Right now may be a good time to pause this program and add other nonnegotiable
things to your Needs List, and then rejoin us when you are ready to move onto
the next must-have relationship tip.
Ready for some touchy-feely stuff? That brings me to affection. Physical
connection may be more commonly associated with men, but don’t forget
that it’s one of your most basic needs! And I don’t just mean sex, although
you deserve to have a mind-blowing sex life that curls your toes and steams
up the windows.
A tight embrace after a long day at work and just being in his arms does
wonders. Cuddling on the couch as you watch a movie – even holding hands
works miracles! It’s that skin on skin that just feels good. There are scads of
studies on human affection that have proven that it’s one of the cornerstones
of a healthy relationship. Even our pets know that.
Why do you think your dog takes up half the bed just to feel your warm body?
Affection. Try it on for size because it’s a good thing.
Physical connection is critical to emotional connection. Couples who have
stopped showing affection in small ways, like holding hands and kissing for no
reason, are significantly less happy than couples who do show affection.
So I mentioned affection, but what about intimacy? It’s another very important
relationship need, the big sister of affection. When you complete this course
and start dating a man, you’ll feel amazing, like the butterflies you had when
the hot guy in high school asked you out. You’ll spend all kinds of time together
and you’ll experience new things together. Your day will not go by fast enough

Chapter Three: Harness the Power of this Knowledge

for you to see him.
But over time that will fade like the sun sets under the horizon. Dating won’t
seem as exciting, and it will take a backseat to everything else in your life.
Some people get “roommate syndrome,” feeling like you are just sharing the
same space. You wish you could snap your fingers and feel the way you did
when he first embraced you. That “zing” just from him grabbing your hand
and squeezing it.
But drifting apart like that doesn’t mean it’s time to sign up for a convent, or
worse, go back to the singles scene or that there is anything wrong with you.
It’s just that – a SIGN!! So read it, listen to it, don’t ignore it! The sign says:
MAKE your relationship a priority. Time for a date night! You want a man who
makes you feel like you’re in the honeymoon period all the time, and a date
night is a great way to recapture those feelings of energy and closeness, and
to reaffirm your commitment to each other. Not to mention the “zing”!
When you put yourself out there, it’s essential that you let men know, very
clearly, exactly what they need to do to make you happy. If you want a man
you can trade gifts of affection with, then you need to make that desire clear.
Try bringing a man a gift and taking note of how he receives it. Is he as
excited as you’d be if you’d gotten a present? Does he seem confused? Is he
completely uninterested?
Chances are, if he doesn’t share your excitement for the little things, he’s not
going to understand how important they are to you. He may not be the right
man to date.
Or try telling him a story about a gift you received, making it clear how wonderful
the experience was for you. In a kind and undemanding way, explain what it
means to you to receive unexpected gifts.
Show him how great it makes you feel.
When he understands how much you value the experience, he’ll want to
provide that kind of happiness for you. Conveying the feelings you experience
is essential.
For instance, “I felt refreshed and one with my body after I used that spa gift

Chapter Three: Harness the Power of this Knowledge

certificate I received. I love feeling that way.” Trust me, he’s going to want to
make you feel that way, you just have to show him how! He just needs some
Many women fail to realize that intimacy is more about being able to ask for
what you want instead of just expecting what you think he should know you
Remember that he isn’t one of those mind-reading geniuses or cosmic, futurepredicting, crystal-ball readers – he’s the man of your dreams.
He desperately wants to be seen that way and he’s willing to work for it. He
wants to know how you feel you deserve to be treated, what you want, and
how you want it.
In order to receive what you deserve, you have to ask for what you want. You
also have to have the strength to reject what you don’t want.
That’s right. Knowing what you DON’T WANT is just as important as
understanding what you DO WANT. How else will you be able to evaluate men
and choose the right partner for yourself?
And I don’t mean superficial little deal-breakers like listening to country music
or having facial hair. Those things have nothing to do with love, intimacy, or
partnership, so cross them off your deal-breakers list right now. Focus on what
REALLY matters: the things that create love and make love last. It’s easy to
list the little things, but you have to look within to find the biggies.
Take some time to think about what you don’t want in a relationship. What kind
of men should you steer clear of? What are some signs that you’re wasting
time on a dead-end relationship with a guy who isn’t right for you?
Most of you have already started to create a list of Don’t Wants because you’ve
either just begun or have already benefited from the Make him Chase You
Playbook. For those of you who haven’t, I suggest you check out the sections
on creating a Don’t Want list. If you haven’t already, start your Don’t Wants
list right now, and for those of you who have, continue adding to it.
Now let’s talk about some of the funnier, or shall we say, “sad” archetypes of
men we’ve seen on the market to date, the men that just don’t suit our needs
for one reason or another.

Chapter Three: Harness the Power of this Knowledge

Take out a pen and your workbook because it’s time to begin working on your
Don’t Date list, or as some of us love to call it, the List of Dating Horrors.
Now, it’s up to you to create your own personal “DON’T DATE” list of men to
avoid, but in case you need a nudge to get your wheels turning, here are a
few suggestions:
#1: The Man-Child. Mom still does his laundry and he still thinks it’s cute to
spend his weekends getting hammered on $3 pitchers of beer. He can hardly
take care of himself, so he’s definitely not ready to take care of you. The ManChild is nowhere near mature enough for a relationship.
#2: The Jekyll-and-Hyde. One minute he’s telling you you’re the reason he
wakes up every morning and the next minute he is arriving at 11 p.m. for the
dinner you had ready at 8, and not even begging forgiveness.
This kind of guy will treat you like you’re a princess, then turn around and
treat your waiter like he’s a slave. Or maybe he showers you with affection
when you’re alone, but acts like you don’t exist when he’s around his friends.
In extreme cases, he may even be physically or verbally abusive. Whatever
the situation, you deserve to be with a man who treats you and everyone else
with love and respect at all times. Don’t settle for anything less.
#3: The Addict. Alcohol, drugs, gambling, and work – this kind of man is a
total junkie for something, and his addiction will always come before your
relationship. Some addictions, like substance abuse, are obvious problems.
But others, like over-exercising or obsessing over work, may be harder to spot
because they’re disguised as virtues.
The fact is, they will always come before you. If he’s not serious about
recovering and putting you first, he’s not worth it. Don’t let them fool you
because anything that takes priority over your relationship is a deal-breaker.
#4: The Player. This one’s a classic, but classics never go out of style. If you’re
just looking for a little fun with an attractive man, then feel free to choose any
man you want.
But if you’re looking for something serious, you have to steer clear of sexobsessed, emotionally unavailable, commitment-phobic guys. Save yourself
for someone who’s worth your love and attention!

Chapter Three: Harness the Power of this Knowledge

#5: The Bad Boy. Another classic type of man that every woman loves and no
woman should date. Sure, they seem exciting on the surface, but they’re also
reckless, unstable, and unavailable. You will not change or tame a Bad Boy, no
matter what you may think, so don’t waste your time trying.
What all these lists boil down to is your self-esteem. Too many women are
afraid to ask for what they want, but they’re making a big mistake. You may
accept Dr. Jekyll and deny Mr. Hyde, but it will catch up with you.
IT DOESN’T make you pushy, needy, or demanding to ask for what you need
in order for a relationship to be fulfilling for you. BE DIRECT.
You won’t be perceived as complaining or whining. Asking for what you
want is empowering and courageous, and it’s necessary if you want to find a
relationship with the right man.
Take a moment to read through your Don’t Date list and add a few more of
the Don’t Date types to the list as you think about them. Remember that it’s
important to add anything that comes to mind. Don’t deflect and say, “Oh, but
it’s really okay if he does XYZ.”
If it’s a deal-breaker, and if it’s broken your relationships in the past, write it
Remember that it is crucial for you to take a walk through your past relationships
if it means getting clear on what you need and knowing that you deserve the
things you truly desire. Be fully prepared to receive them without guilt or
doubt. Then ask Mr. Right for them clearly.
Notice that I said ASK, not EXPECT. Expecting is passive, and that’s not what
this course is about. This is about making change for yourself, not hoping that
good things will come to you by accident.
Now that you’ve started to look at who you are and what you want under a
magnifying glass, it’s time to look at your future goals and your end game.
If you want a long-term monogamous commitment, it’s important to know.
Why waste your time with men who are only interested in casual hookups if
that’s not what you want?

Chapter Three: Harness the Power of this Knowledge

And do you want children? Include that in your relationship vision too, so you
don’t end up on a lot of dead-end dates with men who have no interest in kids.
Ultimately, what you’re asking yourself is this: What’s my end game? What
does being in an intimate relationship really mean to me? This is called “being
connected to your purpose.”
Whenever you’re with a new man, whether you’re on a first date or you just
met each other at the supermarket, you should always have an awareness of
what you’re ultimately after in your life. Just going because he asked you out
is a waste of time.
Have a vision of what you want and what the ingredients of a fulfilling
relationship are. Then evaluate the men you meet through that filter, and ditch
any guy who doesn’t live up to it. There is a wealth of information in Attract
Your Mr. Right program about determining your ideal end game, so go back
and reread it if you need a refresher!
Have you heard of “creative visualization”? It’s commonly discussed in
the sporting world, but it’s also a great tool for your love life. Athletes use
visualization techniques to see their victories before they happen, like a tennis
pro who visualizes a perfect backhand before stepping onto the court for a
The kind of visualization that I’m talking about is exactly the same, except
that you’re going to win a match of a different kind.
Your subconscious mind is an incredibly powerful tool. More powerful than
your conscious mind. And when used correctly, it can have amazing effects on
your love life.
Using your subconscious mind to its fullest begins with affirmations. You have
created your affirmations already from the Attract Your Mr. Right, haven’t
If you haven’t, go back and review the two sections on affirmations to attract
your Mr. Right before moving forward.
Many of you have already created your list of affirmations, and good for you!
Remember that writing down affirmations is up there with eating a healthy

Chapter Three: Harness the Power of this Knowledge

It allows you to visualize and create a clear picture of the relationship that you
want to attract.
Design it if you will, much like Valentino sketches a dress.
This little action actually reprograms your subconscious mind. It’s like having
a video streaming in your mind that you produced and directed. That video
tells your mind what actions to take, right down to who makes you happy in
the dating arena and who doesn’t.
This is why knowing what you want from a relationship is absolutely essential.
When you know what you need, you can program your mind to attract the man
who is a perfect match for you – which brings up a very important question:
What exactly is a perfect match, anyway? Does it even exist? Do opposites
attract, or do birds of a feather flock together?
What exactly, creates a perfect match between two people? A match made
in heaven is when a man and a woman understand each other, respect each
other, communicate, and have incredible chemistry, which only God creates.
You cannot fabricate chemistry from thin air.
Just like in the lab, the answer to this particular equation can only be derived
from your properties and his properties colliding in greatness. A good match
contains commonalities, similar energy, and similar interests at the very least
because you can always pick up interests, and you can always change your
clothes or hairdo, but when it comes to quality, inner quality, they must be
very similar.
Finding a match can be complex. But that complexity can be lessened when
you open yourself up. Intimacy is very difficult when you are shut down.
You’re preventing yourself from not having any intimacy when you do put up
an age group and a certain height, a certain weight, a certain this, a certain
that. It’s not going to work because you’re preventing yourself from finding
somebody and having a relationship in which something can grow.
Some perfect mates may even look alike! They act alike. And in many cases,
they have crossed paths or walked together in previous lifetimes. There’s just
something about them – their qualities, a sense of identity that just gels. And

Chapter Three: Harness the Power of this Knowledge

much of this is based on an equation of comfort and chemistry.
And this big one: You can’t change another person! Sure, you can have
sympathy, empathy, and understanding of another person’s life. But people
are who they are, and if you don’t like that, choose whether you love them
enough to live with it, because it will not change.
I’m sure you have heard before that you cannot change a man. It’s true. So if
real love is what you think you’ll get after you’ve worked some magic on him,
you’re about to expend a massive waste of time and energy.
The right man for you is a man that you love as he is and where he is.
Sounds like a tall order, doesn’t it? But there are ways you can make it easier
to find that kind of love, and the first step is to GO AFTER IT. Stop waiting
around and expecting that the right man will fall into your lap. He might, but
why run the risk that he never will? Forget everything you’ve heard about
women needing to be docile and passive.
Men do want to chase you, but they have to know you’re worth chasing first.
That’s why building self-awareness about what you want and developing the
confidence to go after it are the first two steps of the journey of total life
And that brings us to the end of this segment! To recap, the Top Three
Takeaways from this section are:
1. Self-awareness is one of the most useful and important skills you will
ever develop. The process of meeting your dream man isn’t actually
about the man – it’s all about you.
2. Set the bar high. Know exactly what you want and need from a
relationship, and exactly what you don’t want.
3. Have the confidence to ask for the things you want and reject the things
you don’t.
You are at the starting point on the journey to fulfilling love. Focusing on your
“self” is essential. When you treat yourself well, you treat others well, and

Chapter Three: Harness the Power of this Knowledge

the better your relationship with yourself is, the better your relationships with
men are. This is all about wanting, deserving, and receiving. Be honest with
yourself and know what you want.
Develop self-awareness about what you need and what makes you happy, and
when you’ve identified those things, have the courage to ask for them!
It all starts with you and your ability to respect and admire yourself.
Finding love begins with you.

End of "Trial Chapters"...
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Bikini Body Workouts™ by Jason & Jen Ferruggia

The 60-Day Transformation Program


When we combined our respective skills and specialties and started Bikini Body Secret, in
2009, we remember the profound sense of appreciation mixed with gratitude that we felt
for our first customers. We made up our mind back then that above all else, we would give
everything to uphold and honour the trust that they put in us by investing in our products
and services. It really is a sacred trust. And we’re so thankful that we understand that.
If we were to violate that trust, our business would soon shrivel up and die. To this day,
we’re proud to say that we still feel honoured each and every time that someone like you
invests in what we have to offer. You are the lifeblood of our business. Your willingness to
put your trust in us is a huge thing in our eyes. And, in the simplest possible way, we want to
convey our profound appreciation for that trust.


We are here to serve you. We will help you in every way that we can. We put everything
into our products and services. We bust our tails to deliver value to you. Because we firmly
believe in the Golden Rule. We understand that our business is built on servicing one
customer at a time – and that each customer is a person with goals and dreams that are
unique – and of paramount importance to her.

So...thank you. Thank you for believing in us and trusting in us. We won’t let you down. We
want you to have success, health and body that you desire. We want you to realize your
potential and become the person you know in your heart you can...

....and then we want you to tell everyone who will listen that we helped you do it! ☺
You can do it. You can have the body, health and lifestyle of your dreams if you are
willing to do what is necessary to achieve it. There is no “magic bullet” that will
miraculously transform your body. But there are tested and proven protocols that we
have used with countless clients that will enable you to get to where you want – faster
than you could ever imagine!

What you are about to take part in is truly the Ultimate 28 Day Rapid Fat Loss

We will give you the ball. Will you run with it, with the understanding that life is
short and all you really have is here and now...or will you stand and look around,
finding excuses why you can’t meet the challenge?

The sad truth is that only a small percentage of people are willing to run with the
ball. Most prefer to stay in the comfort zone and never find out what they are capable
of – they never meet the challenge and run with it. And they regret it later.

Our philosophy is “NO REGRETS”. And we sincerely hope that is yours also. We
sincerely hope that you will take the ball and run with it. Because if you don’t, you
will never know what could have been. And that’s no way to live.

Make your dreams reality. Make your body the way you want it to be. Ultimately
what happens to you is COMPLETELY within your control. Don’t abdicate
responsibility for your body, your health and your life. Seize the day! And do it now!
Thank you once again for your support and trust. We want to make this the most life
changing experience possible for you, and are dedicated to getting you into the best
Bikini Body Shape of Your Life.

Before you Start

On the morning of your first day weigh yourself as soon as you get out of bed. Secondly,
measure your waist (through your bellybutton). Third, take a picture of yourself wearing
shorts and a sports bra (very important – it gives you a base photo from which to work with
and will serve as motivation and an accurate picture of how far you have come from day
one.) Get yourself a flip file and store these items in there – we will be reviewing them at
the end of the program.

Are you a Category 1 or a Category 2?

Category 1:
You are a Category 1 if you:

Are not used to regular exercise
Regularly skip breakfast
Regularly eat fast food
Regularly eat processed food or refined carbohydrates
Have struggled to maintain healthy eating habits with previous diets
Drink a lot of calorie containing beverages

Category 2:
You are a Category 2 if you:

Are used to regular exercise
Make healthy eating choices at least 90 % of the time
Don’t eat fast food
Don’t eat processed food or refined carbohydrates
Drink water as your main beverage

The goal is to ultimately be a Category 2 – that is where the magic happens with body
composition, hormonal balance, health and energy.

That being said, if you are not used to eating in that fashion it will be a very hard approach
to suddenly adopt. We recommend a stepped approach, by first adopting some basic new
nutrition habits and getting used to them and getting the maximum fat loss benefits from
them and the increased exercise, and then moving onto a more detailed and “restrictive”
approach. We promise that you will lose weight on both approaches, depending which
category you fall into. And once you have become accustomed to the habits in Category 1 (3
– 4 weeks), it will be relatively easy to transition into Category 2.

What You Should Eat: Category 1

Before we start worrying about protein ratios, healthy fat etc - we need to get some habits:

Here is what I am going to suggest:

1. Eat Breakfast

2. Eliminate all refined sugar from your diet

3. Drink more zero calorie fluids (particularly water)

4. If you drink alcohol – drink 50% less

5. Reduce carbohydrates by a few bits per meal. So, if you eat a burger and chips for lunch
then don’t eat ALL the chips. If you eat them all start over on day 1.

6. Exercise 5 days per week for 30 minutes (training is already 3 days - so do something on
your other 2 days). What type? It doesn’t matter…just do something!

7. If you think it’s not a good food choice, then DON’T eat it. There’s more food choice
education out there then there has ever been in history. I think you know that potato chips
are not better than a salad for an appetizer, ice cream is not better than fruit, etc.

You are going to eat according to these rules for 3 weeks continuously. It is very important
that we address these basic habits, before trying to get fancy. Weight loss will still occur
rapidly, because you are adding in the appropriate exercise with the bootcamp classes, as
well as refining your food habits. If you can follow these easy guidelines you are already
doing better than almost 90 % of the population and will have a very solid foundation to
start with the next phase. If you aren’t able to follow these guidelines, it will be very hard to
follow the guidelines for phase 2. So it is very important that we build these basic habits as a
foundation and can grow from there.

What You Should Eat: Category 2

The list below is not an exhaustive list, but it makes things easy to have an idea of what you
are going to eat. Buy enough to last you for at least a week and feel free to substitute your
favourites in here. We are not going to insult your intelligence by telling you what a fruit or
a vegetable is. I encourage you to experiment with some varieties that you have never tried
before. When buying fruit and vegetables, think of the rainbow and buy a whole lot of
different types.





Wild salmon








Grass fed beef



Olive Oil


Stone fruits


Nut Butters




Coconut Oil




Macadamia Oil


Kiwi Fruit


Various Nuts

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